The Answer. . .

Ask and ye shall receive.



The compressive strength of one Heineken Light bottle, emptied, but with the cap replaced is 880.33 pounds per square inch using the bottom surface area of 4.43015 inches squared.

Below is a blurry action photo of the failure as I hid behind the door after I realized it was going much higher than I anticipated.


The bottle withstood a total load of 3900 foot-pounds of force before failure.



I suppose I'll be finding the broom now.



Disclaimer: Smashing stuff in a 400,000 pound load press is dangerous business and should only be attempted after drinking a minimum of 4 adult beverages and without the help of stupid safety devices like hardhats, face shields and rubber chickens. Because really, there's no fun in safe!