"Americans used to say where there's a will, there's a way. Nowadays, it's where there's a pill, there's a way out." - - Burnt Toast
Showing posts with label computer problems. Show all posts
Showing posts with label computer problems. Show all posts

It's A Gi-raffe, It's A Gi-raffe. . .

Through the miracle of modern serendipity, I was able to re-install "Winders" yesterday, fully and completely using my off-the-shelf purchased copy of XP Service Pack 2. How'd I do it you ask? Beats the hell outta me, but I'm not complaining.

SHE LIVES!!

I trimmed some of the fat from the install and now have a lean and mean computing machine. I've also taken to liberty of downloading Sun Micro's Open Office suite, which is an open source MS Office comparable. I'll let you guys know how it works as I use it a bit.

Ahhh, the luxury of a happy-go-lucky computer, contently whirring along, munching ones and zeroes effortlessly in seemingly endless fashion. Thanks be to silicon!

Ok, I've left many an open hole around this place, so I guess I better get to work! I suspect that FedEx will be arriving soon with my matched and signature verified recovery CD with Service Pack 2 slipstreamed inside. I think I'll carry it home this weekend, blast a hole in the package with the .357 magnum and send it back to HP in Maharashtra. Along with a kind note declaring, "¡Chupa la verga, carepichas!"

I think it's time for some music. . .

. . .oh, Bodhisattva, won't you take me by the hand?

Read more...

HP Stands For. . .

Hardly Productive.

Happily I recieved my HP recovery CD's this morning. Two copies of them no less. Adn now, I'm stuck in this godforsaken loop again!! After waging war against the automated operator of HP, I finally got some poor fellow from Gujarat on the phone and this time, absolutely guaranteed, the will provide me with a full version, copied and matched set of Windows XP and it's signature verified cousin Windows XP Service Pack 2.

At no charge.

Call me a pessimist, but I have my doubts that this is going to work.

Is it Groundhog day?

Read more...

HP Stands For. . .

Happening Poorly.

William Hewlett and David Packard are probably rolling over in their graves.

I am half way to becoming a computer scientist as I eke a little life back into this square box of silicon and copper. A rather rough go of it, but hey, life is about learning and if you're not willing to learn, then you will end up like this person.

I called HP to request a new copy of the recovery CD that goes with this laptop. I've used another copy of Windows to be able to use my computer, but it loaded generic drivers for most of the devices and even though I've replaced those with the proper upgrade, the computer is still not operating at full speed.

I got email notice shortly after my request for a new CD, of which I had to pay for the shipping and handling, and realized the CD was being shipped to, of all places, Hattiesburg! To my sister!!! What the hell? I had just given "Mary Jane" the proper address over the phone and they still shipped it to an address I used when I was overseas.

Not only that, but I had given them the address twice before and not only that, last year they shipped me a box to put my laptop in for repairs that I shipped to them and then they shipped back to me!! To this address!! OMG!! WTF!!

*sigh*

I find myself sitting here, staring at the phone, awaiting with glee the confrontation that is to come. I paid to have overnight shipping and it is now day three. Can't wait to talk to this "Mary Jane" again.

So, as we wait together, let's enjoy a video courtesy of Nauti Girl! She poses the question: how many illegals can you fit in one van?

Read more...

The New Leaf. . .

Computer Status Update: still farked!

Near-Term Future Outlook Parameter: closer to unfarked

Alright, alright. I know it's been mighty damn boring around her without my usual vulgurated banter and news ANAL-y-sis, but please people, don't crowd and by all means REMAIN CLAM! (p.s. it's misspelled intentionally and just be glad I never left a cheese sandwich hidden in YOUR couch.)

The computer device is on it's way to happily calculating ones and zeroes again and I'm well aware that I have considerable catching up to do. With our new black president and all, I feel like the world is leaving me behind. I even broke free of the beautiful gravity of Egypt Hill to come "in town" to talk to you people. See how special you are? How 'bout a round of applause for the audience!

**cricket chirp**

Ahh, actually I came in town to purchase the necessary augmentation for my garden. Yes folks, it's almost that time of the year again. Last year's garden went to hell in a handbasket when I was traveling and staying in Gulfport over the summer. The weeds got out of hand and I got all involved with Beatrice, so in essence, it's her fault. I blame her. Yes that's it. ALL. HER. FAULT.

After I finish this I am headed over to our local mom and pop garden store to purchase no less than 20-40# bags of manure, 50 pounds of lime and the latest widgetry they've invented for the nouveau riche gardener like me. Garden Weasel anyone?

Oh, does anyone else find it oddly entertaining that there is actually an industry, outside of politics, where 'mierda' is an openly accepted and desired end product? Hhmmppphh.

So, I'm off now. I leave you with a excellent live version of We Were Born To Be Loved by King's X, which was filmed in Germany. Although the goddamn Germans had nothing to do with it.

Read more...

1 00 1 00 1. . .S.O.S.

The saga continues. . .




The computer is still farked as I wait on this to arrive next week. Unfortunately, I live in Mississippi, which is kinda like living on Cygnus X-1,



except life is possible here and the women are better looking. Oh, and Mississippi isn't a black hole and here we don't weigh infinity, but in Mississippi it's impossible to go down to the local Fry's and buy the necesary widget to breathe life back into my computer so I might as well live in a black hole.



I bet they got great TV programming. Only a nerd would understand that.



So, I sit on the event horizon of infinity, overlooking everyone's donut hole and wondering in awe. . .

hey, did you wipe?

Read more...

The Hard Way. . .

Gotta love Microsoft.

I tried re-installing Windows XP yesterday and have run into some difficulties, so the trusty ol' laptop is down until further notice. Posting may be at a trickle.

Remember kids, always delete to old partition first, cause if your WIN XP copy in the partition is newer than your recovery CD, then the computer will get stuck in a setup loop asking for a Service Pack 2 file as the install of XP is compared to the partitioned copy. Using a burned copy of SP2 will not work because the upgrade file is an executable file only. So, I'm stuck in loop, stuck in a loop, stuck in a loop. . .

And also for your info, at least on my HP Pavilion ZD8110, there is not way to interfere with install during the reboot to cancel the install and F8 is no help either. It simply leads back to asking for the SP2 'asms' file. SHit! Double SHit! And since during reboot, WIN XP is able to capture the hard drive, holding it hostage virtually, I cannot backdoor a format c: using shift+F10 to kill the partition either. Farked I'm telling you!!

Anyway, my dilemma for today. Have good one!

Read more...

Look Out Below. . .

There is a new post below the Tool video about the inauguration yesterday. I'm too lazy to move it ahead and my computer is bugging out also. So scroll down for a new reading.

I'll probably be offline for a bit, while I try to diagnose the funky behaviour of this apparatus. Wish me luck and have a good day!

Read more...

Red Alert. . .

Computer is dying and so is my plane ticket to Houston.

Remain in your current holding pattern until further notice.

Read more...

Picture

Picture
Herbs!

About This Blog

StatCounter

  © Blogger template Shush by Ourblogtemplates.com 2009

Back to TOP