If it walks like a duck. . .

Some dunderhead in the Florida Senate wants to ban the use of the term "illegal alien" from the state's official documents.

"I personally find the word 'alien' offensive when applied to individuals, especially to children," said Sen. Frederica Wilson, D-Miami. "An alien to me is someone from out of space."

Do what? Could you say that again please?

"An alien to me is someone from out of space."

Ahhhh, okkkaaaaayy.

Changing a few words on government forms isn't going to help a damn thing lady, but I'll play the game.

Instead of alien, let's use "extraneous human." How about that? Or better even, "non-familiar bio-creature." Or "incongruous interloper." Are any of those better?

And heavens we certainly can't call anyone an "illegal alien" any longer, can we?

"'Illegal,' I can live with, but I like 'undocumented' better," she said.

Undocumented my ass. Let's try "CRIMINAL."