Calculations

Guess what motherfuckers?

It has been over 55,987,200 seconds since I last posted on this blog.  And for good goddamn reason too.  Being stalked by a crazy person is a serious ordeal and let's just say a big ol' 'fuck yo couch' to that piece of work.  The stalker had more baggage than Continental Airlines.  I'll be here all night.

In the preceding multitude of seconds many things have changed in my life, some have remained the same, but most importantly I have learned many a lesson about how to treat people, about generosity and care, about opening myself completely to someone special and unique, and, yes dear reader, I still know what else they have in Puerto Rico.  Ask me, I'll tell you.

I still enjoy some of the fine activities that rural life affords like gardening or ripping through the mud on El Kabong (you'll learn about him later) or blasting the .44 magnum off the front porch while naked.  I'm not so much of a Jagermeister drinker anymore, because hell, even an eternal child like myself has to grow up sometime.  I drink tequila now instead.

The cat family bulged to a total of 4, but a recent loss has narrowed it to 3.  I still have Wildcat and Shadow and a new addition named Ginger.  We recently lost a kitty named Quila and she was a sweet little girl and we miss her dearly.

Alright enough of that shit.

Fuck you, I'm back.  Meaner than hell and about 75% as smart as I used to be.  Let's get on with this crap, time is a wasting.